“Through the blur, I wondered if I was alone or if other parents felt the same way I did – that everything involving our children was painful in some way. The emotions, whether they were joy, sorrow, love or pride, were so deep and sharp that in the end they left you raw, exposed and yes, in pain. The human heart was not designed to beat outside the human body and yet, each child represented just that – a parent’s heart bared, beating forever outside its chest.”
― Debra Ginsberg
One hundred eighty-one. That’s how many days we’ve been blessed by our sweet baby boy. The last time I wrote we were only four weeks in! Since then we have played, changed lots of diapers, cuddled, cried, … and watched lots of Grey’s Anatomy. I planned on writing about how amazing motherhood is, along with how hard it is. However, the quote that I found is too perfect for words. I especially like where Debra says, “The human heart was not designed to beat outside the human body and yet, each child represented just that…”
Brady is my heart. I care for my dogs. My family is incredibly important to me. I love my husband. But, Brady is my heart. It’s different. It’s special. Because of that, being a mom is very hard. Am I doing this right? Will he be successful? Am I truly doing everything that I can for him? Motherhood comes with all of these questions. And most of them you can’t answer. However, I know when I look at that sweet smiling face that somehow, I AM doing this right. He WILL be successful. I AM truly doing everything that I can for him. Because he is my heart.
There are hardships. There are lots of smiles. There are late nights and early mornings. And there is my heart, beating outside my chest in the midst of it all. I wouldn’t trade this life for anything.
In honor of B being six months this Wednesday, here are six of my favorite photos.